Is there anything you want to add arising from anything in the above survey?
DS has brought out much more sexual interest and adventure from my wife. She is also now very positive about sex.
I was discussing some of these ideas with my Princess. I think that Devotional Sex allows for the discussion about sex, which in Vanilla sex are unwritten. Devotional Sex partly seems kinky, just by the very fact that the 'rules' are written down and discussed. As we talked, I imagined, what if we were to write the 'rules' of vanilla sex down somewhere, they might be something like this:
"We are a couple together aiming to be happy in our love and sex lives. However, our needs and desires wane and do not always match. When this happens, I will ask you for sexual activity or try to arouse you. If you do not get in the mood, I will feel rejected and frustrated, as I wanted sex and do you not provide. If this happens often, I will find porn and masturbate alone. Over time, this will mean that I reduce my sexual interest in you. Because I am less interested in you, you will also masturbate and so our sex lives will diminish. Rather than talk about it, we will slide down this path. There will be moments when we do have sex, and connect, but more often we will masturbate separately. Shall we commit to this relationship?"
I am not saying that Devotional Sex is for everyone, nor that everyone in Vanilla sex has the sex life described above, but I imagine that the scenario above does exist for many couples in a long term relationship.